I seem to have a knack for weird happenstances with my pets! I guess it’s not really that strange, but it makes for a good laugh in retrospect, as I can say at the time of the incidence I wasn’t at all amused, angry would have better summed up my demeanor. Last night it was amazingly mild, it was absolutely awesome to be able to sleep with our bedroom window wide open and enjoy the sound of the breeze rustling the leaves on our silver maple. Romeo, our cat loves it when he can sit on the back of the bed frame, he sleeps all day, so why not set up a vigil to watch the goings on in the yard. I really don’t take issue with this past time if he is quiet and respectful. What do I mean by “respectful”? My dear feline has a bad habit of jumping off the headboard and has occasionally used me as a runway. You can probably figure out where this is going! Last night my hubby’s Breathe Right Strip was woefully inadequate at managing his snoring, he was tossing and turning a fair bit and at one point ended up on my side of the bed, right in Romeo’s trajectory . I was slumbering on my back, blissfully unaware that my spouse was breathing in my ear or that the cat was hovering above my head wanting to return to the foot of the bed. I guess the cat must have done some kind of risk analysis assessing which one of his housemates would make a better landing pad. He must have thought of the time that he made a misstep, landing on my hubby, who didn’t react well to a set of claws in his rib-cage and flung him into the air, causing the cat to land with a thud on the floor. My guess is he looked at me and figured I was the more tolerant person, the animal lover and I wouldn’t flinch. I was in the middle of a dream when his twenty pounds of cat flesh dropped onto me with full force, front claws embedding themselves in the fleshy part of my clavicle, with his back foot landing on my larynx. The wind was basically knocked out of me as I lay prone on the mattress feeling rather incensed with what had just transpired. It was all I could do not to launch my dear kitty into the air with my foot as he made his way to the end of the bed to snuggle my feet. I think it was the first time I didn’t give him a pass, I took my toes and I believe somewhat gently nudged him off the bed to make my point that I wasn’t feeling in a very affectionate frame of mind. As I lay still, chest in pain I started to develop a rash where the claws punctured my skin, great fun! That’s when my spouse’s snoring ramped up into the extra voluminous zone, the fact that it hurt to breathe, my itchy skin, and the noise level, made getting back to sleep rather challenging. I spent the next two hours in a bizarre sort of Post Catmatic Stress, I couldn’t relax because I was afraid that the cat was going to re-offend and come back into the room and jump on me again,which he did in fact return. I spent way too much energy repetitively removing him from his perch instead of taking him out of the bedroom, in my defense I figured he would just meow loudly and bang on the door, so I wasn’t going to get any sleep when I ran the scenario in my head. When I acquiesced that I wasn’t going to get any rest, I could have gotten out of bed all snarly and bent out of shape this morning, but why let the past annoy me, better to leave all that angst behind and laugh about it a few hours later! It is still an amazingly warm day, perhaps I should try sleeping tonight with a hard hat on and football padding :o)
No Time To Paws 